MSOIA Mentors: Treat a Girl, Jeff Hardy and Jojo
by HaphazardbyMikey
Summary: "Where's that dumbass little inbred bimbo?"  "I'm looking at him," Jojo deadpanned. An 'old friend' comes by to visit Jeff and gets a cap shot up his ass since he doesn't know how to treat a girl.


**A/N:Okay, it's fic time! once again, this is part of the MSOIA Mentors series(which you don't have to read in order since none of them have anything to do with the other anyhow). Remember, these are NOT part of the Making sense of it all timeline, they are just examples of what a certain pair up of superstars and my ocs might be like if I chose that superstar to be a permanent mentor to the girls in the actual story. So let's get to it!**

**Disclaimer: Oh, and FTR, I can only wish that I owned all the sexy superstars in this story, but sadly, all I own is Jojo and Danny's crazy asses.**  
><strong>Jojo+Danny:Excuse you. You know you love us!<strong>  
><strong>Ooh, wait, I have a white pitbull puppy named Sheamus, does that count for anything?...What? Nothing AT ALL?<strong>  
><strong>Damnit, well then he can carry his lil old shitty ass back where he came from...<strong>

"Who the hell are you? You know what, never mind, it don't matter. Where's that dumbass little inbred bimbo?"

"I'm looking at him," Jojo deadpanned. She stared at the tall, lanky, short haired blonde man in front of her. The man glowered at her through the screen door of the large house. Sweat ran down his forehead and soaked his already saturated shirt on the hot summer day in Cameron, North Carolina. He seemed extremely pissed. Most people would be after spending twenty minutes in the heat trying to argue and outwit Jojo, who was standing, comfortably behind the door, the a/c on, cooling the whole house. The man narrowed his eyes.

"I'm serious, you little shit. Where's Hardy?"

"Ricky Hardy? Why on Earth would I know? It's not like I'm allowed to vote," Jojo shrugged. She smirked as she saw the man's teeth grind against each other as he became more and more irritated.

"No. You know damn well that I'm talking 'bout-"

"Frank Hardy?"

"No-"

"Joe Hardy?"

"No-"

"Ed Hardy!"

The man shut his eyes and clenched his jaw. Jojo smiled.

"Hey, man, don't give up just yet! I can go on all day!" She laughed.

Jojo and her cousin Danny were staying with their mentors, Jeff and Matt Hardy, at their homes in Cameron for a few days since they had more than a few signings, conferences and shows to put on in the guys' hometown. Jojo had been watching the guys tape an episode of the Hardy show along with Danny in the backyard, but she had wandered off to find a snack about an hour ago. She had contentedly sat down with a sandwich, watching tv, when she saw a shiny, gray, new F1-50 pull up in front of the house through the window. The guy who had climbed out of the truck seemed pretty pissed as he slammed the door behind him and marched up to the front porch.

Jojo let the man knock furiously for about a good ten minutes before she finally opened the door, leaving the screen one closed.  
>That is when the bickering began as the man immediatley demanded that Jojo "Open the damn door and let him the hell in before he broke it down". To which Jojo responded "Not by the hair of my chinny-chin-chin, ya big ass, cornfed, bastard." And of course, the man, offended, had sat in the heat, going at it with the 13 year old. He was persistant, but Jojo, ugh, Jojo was Jojo.<p>

"Will you just go get Jeff, already?" He growled.

Jojo shrugged, "It depends,"

"On what?"

"When you close your eyes, do you see a little, shiny, snaggle tooth man named Colitis scalping a bald cat?"

The man rolled his eyes,"No,"

"Well, then, there's your answer!" Jojo finished. She started to kick the door closed as she turned to walk away, more than ready to get back to her sandwich and cartoons and stop messing around with this thick headed moron. She had gotten the door halfway closed when she heard the the familiar shatter of glass from behind her. Jojo froze in her spot as an irritated scowl came over her face. She slowly turned around, opening the door. First, she looked down to the floor, covered in shards of glass. Then she looked up at the man, a look of disgust coming over her face as she saw him smirk.

Jojo breathed out slowly and deliberately, as she opened the now destroyed screen door. The man's smirk only grew as he stepped into the house and attempted to push past Jojo.

"Glad you see things my way, sweetness," As he pushed by her, Jojo caught the back of his collar, roughly yanking him back. He stumbled and nearly fell int the bits of glass, not that Jojo actually would've cared if he had.

"Where in the monkey's funky uncle do you think you're going? I didn't let you in for a grand tour of the place, you're in here so you can clean up the mess you made," Jojo blindly grabbed behind the door, grasping a broom handle. She tossed it at the man and he fumbled as he tried to catch it.

" Get to it."

The man looked the child up and down, shrugging her hand of his shoulder. He leaned down so that he was face to face with her and he looked her in the eye. Jojo stared back with no doubt more intensity in her eyes than expected, arms crossed over her chest, a sneer on her face.

"I, am not, cleaning, this up," The man said slowly, as if Jojo couldn't understand him if he spoke any faster.

Jojo scoffed and rolled her eyes,"Mais, I ain't cleaning it up. If you didn't come here for nothing but to cut up, then you coulda stayed at your own big plot of land that houses your own I-Magi-Nation. Oh wait, you ain't got one of those, do you? And you want to know why?  
>It's because the only thing you're good for is studding 'bout everyone else's business besides your own and sweating bullets like you're prepping for war-"<p>

Jojo was cut off as her head snapped to the side. The man began cursing her, shoving her back, but the only thing Jojo was focused on was the stinging on her right cheek. Her mind couldn't comprehend what had just happened...That guy didn't just slap her...Did he? And if he did, he isn't STILL putting his hands on her...Is he?

Jojo slowly looked up, the man's angry voice not completely getting through to her as she glared daggers at him, holding her burning cheek. His veins popped out and spit flew from his mouth as he continued to yell insults at the teen, who stared, eerily calm at him.  
>After awhile, the man's voice began to lower as he breathed into Jojo's face.<p>

"What? You don't have nothing you want to say now? What a surprise," He growled low as he leaned back down, closer to Jojo's face. She glared back at him.

"What you gonna do? Cry? Little city slicking bitc-"

Before he could finish his sentence, Jojo's fist shot out and caught him dead in the jaw. He stumbled back a bit, holding his jaw, and Jojo followed after him slowly, a sneer on her face. The man tried to regain his composure, pulling himself up to a sitting position with the help of the small table next to him. He glared up at Jojo and she stared him down, quietly. She leaned down next to him and picked up the broom off the floor, dropping it in his lap.

"I'm going to go finish my sandwich. Clean up that mess before I finish and I might let you leave here with no more than a cracked jaw."

Jojo began to canter off back towards the living room, but pissed off and with bruised pride, the man growled and grabbed a hold of her leg, tripping her. He quickly dragged her downed body closer to him, grabbing her by the arms, hard enough to bruise. Jojo kicked and scratched under him as she felt a fist connect with her back. Irritated, Jojo broke loose and grabbed the thing nearest to her, a vase that had fallen onto the floor off the table that the man was leaning on. She picked it up and blindly chucked it behind her head. She heard the glass shatter and the man released her. She stood back up and faced him, seeing that the vase hadn't actually come in contact with him, just near his head. The man stood up too and attempted to spear her down, but she landed a knee strike to his gut and an elbow strike to his temple. He teetered on his feet and Jojo took the chance when his guard was down to land a roundhouse kick to his temple. The man fell over and before she could advance anymore, she heard several footsteps racing through the house.

"What the hell is going on?" Jeff shouted as he burst though the back door. He looked at the living room and hall, both seeming as though a hurricane had passed through. Behind him, Matt, Shannon, Shane, and Danny all flooded in from the backyard.

Jojo's head snapped up and she looked at her mentor, a smile coming over her face as she switched her gaze from Jeff to the man.

"You better catch him, Jeff. He don't know me, I'll kill him," Jojo laughed darkly under her breath. Jeff looked over to the man he was just realizing was strewn all over his floor, in a grunting, beaten mess.

"Who is...Mase?" Realization dawned over Jeff's face,"What the hell are you doing here?"

Mase stood up ," What the hell do you think, you good for nothing shit? You owe me,"

Jeff walked over to him, laughing sarcastically ,"Owe you? Owe you? I don't owe you jackshit, Mase. You're the one who owes ME something,"

"And what's that? An apology? I hurt the baby Hardy's feelings, is that it? Well you gonna keep on waiting, but I'm sure as hell getting mine, here and now!" Mase growled, shoving Jeff back hard. Jeff rolled his neck back, trying to keep his cool. He really didn't feel like having to deal with this idiot again.

A couple years back, Mase had tried to get Jeff and Matt to help him break into his ex girlfriend's house to get back at her. Jeff and Matt had refused to help, but Mase had gone along with it anyway, destroying everything in her house, and tearing the actual home apart. And just to be spiteful since his two 'best friends' refused to help him, he spray painted their names on her car. When his girlfriend had seen it the next day, she immediatley stormed over to Jeff's house. Jeff had without hesitation, explained to her what really happened and she pressed charges against Mase.

"What the hell you gonna do, fight him? Pshht, didn't I just hand you your own ass on the fanciest dish you've ever seen?" Jojo snided from behind Jeff.

Mase took a menacing step towards her, but she never shied away. Though something at this moment did click in Jeff's head. He snapped his head up and glared at Mase.

"You put your hands on that little girl?" Jeff demanded.

Mase looked up at him and sneered.

"If I did, it ain't none of your business,"

"Hell to the the damn yeah it is. This is my house, so it's my business. And speaking of, what the hell are you even doing here?"

"I was looking for your pussy ass, you motherfu-"

"Stop all that damn cussing in front these kids, man! What the hell's wrong with you, are you drunk? Again?" Jeff growled, raising his voice.

Mase rolled his eyes and got in Jeff's face.

"No. You high, again?"

Jeff screwed his eyes shut. That one stung.

"No you dumbass sink rat, Jeff's been clean for years," Jojo yelled stepping up closer to Mase.

"Ain't nobody talking to you, now take your little bad weave and sit your stupid ass back, ho!" Mase yelled as he reached out and slapped her again. Jojo instantly sprung on him, letting punches rain down on his face. Before the others could react, Mase had caught hold of her and started shaking her like a rag doll, gripping her arms hard.

Danny ran forward to try and help her cousin, landing a punch to the back of his head. Soon, the guys were all surrounding them, ripping Mase off the thirteen year old. As Jeff, Shane, Shannon, and Matt lifted him off her, Jojo managed to get in one good kick to his nose. She smirked as she saw blood start to run out of it. The three guys drug Mase towards the exit and threw him out the door, cursing all the way.

"Y'all think y'all so damn tough? Wait 'til I come back. Imma get that little skank. She think she know how to fight, we gonna see!" He yelled as Matt threw him towards his truck. After a little while, the sound of a car starting up and speeding off was audible.

Jeff turned to Jojo, looking her over to make sure she was fine.

"You okay there, Jojo?"

The teen's rage filled eyes shot up to him and she stared at him for a second as she calmed.

"No...I'm mad as hell. Who the hell does he think he is?" Jojo snided as Jeff helped her up. Jeff sighed.

"He thinks he's some hot stud who can do whatever he wants without being punished for it and that he's the coolest, most wanted thing on the market, when he's actually a foul mooded, pissy, warthog of a drunk. He trashed his ex-girlfriend's house and car, even though he broke up with her. Let's just forget it for now, though okay." Jeff mumbled to his friends, "Jojo, you sure that you're alright?"

"No, I think I broke a nail!"Jojo fake wailed sarcastically. _'Yeah, she's fine'_ Jeff thought to himself.

* * *

><p>"You gonna be alright, Jojo?" Jeff asked for the hundreth time since Mase stopped by. After the incident, they had all settled down to watch movies for a few hours before turning in. Jojo, though, had seemed on edge the whole time. Jeff was now in the guest room tucking her in.<p>

"Not if you keep asking me that, I won't," Jojo growled from under the covers, looking up at Jeff. Jeff laughed.

"Hey, don't get mad at me for worrying about the sweetest little girl in the world," Jeff cooed out in a baby voice, just to aggravate Jojo.

"Psht! I think you're getting the two of us mixed up, Jeffrey, darling," Danny laughed as she strode in and climbed into the top bunk of the bed.

Jeff smirked, "Why I could never do that, Danny, honey, because you see, one of you has nappy hair, and the other has dry alligator skin!" Jeff shrieked as he tried to dodge the pillows being thrown at him from the two yelling girls. He made a mad dash for the door, flicking of the lights and yelling a goodnight as he laughed his way out.

The room quieted as the two cousins glared after him. Danny leaned over the bedrail and looked at Jojo, seeing her eyes shining mischieviously in the dark.

"You ain't going to sleep, are you?"

"Nope,"

"Waiting for that Mase dude to show back up?"

"Possibly,"

"You scared?"

"Of what?"

"The guy,"

"Psht,"

Danny smirked and climbed down to lie next to her cousin on the bottom bunk.

"So what's the plan?"

"When little Mr. Mase shows back up, he'll get a nice surprise. He wanted a fight, well now he's got one," Jojo said calmly in the dark, a smirk on her face.

"How do you know for sure that he'll be back?"

"You heard Jeff. He's a temperamental drunk. You and I both know the type," At those words, the two girls quieted, the tension in the room growing with each passing second as they tried to compose themselves before even the thought of a tear could enter their minds.

"And we also know just how to handle his type," Danny said coolly, breaking the silence.

"He'll be back, though. I'm sure of it," Jojo looked to her cousin, her eyes flashed evilly as they made contact with Danny's in the dark.

"You ready to show that country bastard what little girls are made of?" The smile Danny returned to her cousin lit up the whole room as the two girls slid out of bed and out the door.

* * *

><p>A gray F1-50 pulled up the driveway for the second time that day. As Mace's truck raced down the path, gravel and dust flew all over.<br>He came to a stop in front of Jeff's house. He angrily climbed out the car and slammed the door shut behind him, two other guys climbing out behind him. One of them flicked on a flashlight, shining it towards the house. The three men stormed up the steps, Mase cussing the whole way under his breath.

They got on the porch and Mase raised his balled fist up, ready to beat the door in.

"Don't knock. You'll wake my friends up," Jojo said casually. Mace stopped mid-knock as his head snapped around, catching sight of the girl he was looking for, layed out on a bench on the porch, a blanket covering her legs, in a black hoodie. Mace glared at her.

"You stuck up little shit. You got nerve, you know that?"

"Taking all your questions and comments in stride, as compliments-"

"Answering with sass, and confidence!" A second voice, Danny's chimed from the other corner of the porch, where she reclined in the porch swing.

The three men's heads snapped towards her voice. She picked up a hand and waved, a smug smile on her face.

"Oh, so what, there's two of you? Ha, that ain't gonna change not a damn thing, sweets, you still gonna get it for what you did,"

"Hm. Really? Cuz I think it will. And even of it doesn't, these, I'm sure will," Jojo said introspectively as she pulled out a shotgun from under the blanket covering her, Danny picking up an identical one from under the swing.

The three men went rigid, but tried to play it off. Jojo and Danny watched smirking as Mase's two buddies gingerly and discreetly shuffled back a few inches behind Mase. Mase decided to try and be the man of the group.

"You think I'm scared of you? So you got a couple guns. What're you gonna do? Shoot me? Ha! You two city girls probably don't even know how to load a gun, let alone shoot one! Tell me, where you from, I bet some place all 'fancy' like New York or the hills, huh?"

Jojo laughed. "New York? The Hills? Ha! Naw, man, we from 5th ward, New Orleans."

"Quaint little town," Danny hummed," But you definatley figure out how to load, and shoot-'

"And sometimes jack-"Jojo added in.

"Yes, and sometimes, jack a gun, down there."

Mase frowned. Not exactly what he was expecting.

"Don't matter. You two are still some of those big shot pro wrestlers on tv. You ain't gon kill nobody-"

"Ha! What makes you so sure I already haven't? I mean think about it, Masey-Boy. I'm only thirteen, I'm having a great run in WWE, and just get a look at this adorable innocent face!" Jojo said, pulling out a puppy dog pout. Mase looked at her, unexpectantly smitten by her baby face features, but immediatley was back on edge as her face transformed into a mischievious, toothy smile, and her eyes glinted in the dark, "Do you really think anyone would actually believe it if I had?"

Damn, she had a good point. But Mase wasn't about to let her know that.

"Maybe so, but you ain't got the balls to shoot that thing!" He spat. Both girls burst into loud, obnoxious laughter.

"Okay, okay, okay. Seriously now," Danny said, picking up her gun, placing her finger near the trigger.

"We are going to play a little game of 20 questions. If you get a score lower than 20 you are out, and by out, I mean-Ka-psht!-out. Each question is worth five points. Now, if you are to fail, and score lower than 20 points, then you will be shot at-but-you have a choice of who shoots you. Because you see, one gun is locked and loaded with lead bullets. The other is not. If I were you, I'd choose carefully. Let the games begin!" Danny lectured and both girls cocked their guns into place, aiming at the group of men.

The three men all froze in their spots, Mase eyeing the girls hatefully, the other two eyeing Mase for even bringing them along.

"Question one, "Jojo started, "What happens when you grip a little girl's arms and shake her like some kind of ragdoll?"

Mase glared at her, "She gets a big, nasty bruise."

Jojo looked up and stifled a laugh as she let her head drop down, polishing the gun with her blanket.

"Question two: What happens when you slap a little girl in the face, twice?"

"She cries," Mase spat. Jojo rolled her eyes.

"Question three: What happens when a grown man tries to look for a fight with a little girl?"

"The little girl gets the crap kicked out of her," Jojo didn't even look his way, just stared straight ahead at her cousin, who was shaking her head, disappointed.

"Last question: What happens when that little girl's name happens to be Jojo Hebert?"

"She shuts up and goes on with her business," Mase growled.

"Shame, shame, shame," Danny muttered shaking her head.

"I know, right? Anyone of those questions could have been answered with ' She takes a gun to his ass'. Oh well. Pick your poison, son," Jojo chided.

Mase rolled his eyes.

"You ain't shooting not a damn body," He mumbled, starting to walk away, back to his car.

"Smart man,"Jojo mumbled as he walked off. Right before he got off the porch, Mase swung around when they weren't expecting it and lunged at Jojo.

The unmistakeable bang of two simultanious gunshots followed closely by a howl of pain rang all throughout the night around the Hardy residency. Hearing the noise, Jeff woke with a start and screamed. He ran out into the hall and almost tripped over his brother Matt, as he raced out from his room. Both of them cut it to the guest room that their two rookies were staying in. Seeing the beds empty, they ran down the stairs in a panic, fearing the worst.

Outside, the two men stared incrediously at their good friend, Mase, stumbling back, holding onto his side, as red liquid oozed from inbetween his fingers. They turned and saw the bullet holes in the side of Mase's new truck too.

"Hey! You said only one had lead bullets in it!" one of the men yelled accusingly at Jojo, who sat deathly calm. She smiled.

"Yes, I did say that now, didn't I?" The man jumped back as she rose the gun once again, aiming towards them, as Danny shot another two holes in the back of the F1-50.

At that moment, the Hardy brothers both burst through the door. The damage that greeted them, shocked them, but a wave of relief wahsed over them as they saw the girls sitting uninjured. But then they looked to the three men across from them: Trembling, shocked and one bloody. Jeff's head snapped back to Jojo and for the first time he saw the gun in her hand.

"Jojo," Jeff breathed out slowly.

Jojo looked up at him calmly, before a smile broke out on her face.

"Oh, Jeffy, Jeffy, Jeffy, I just shot a man down. In your front yard. In front of a little crowd!" She sang out, mimicking Rihanna.

Jeff stared at her disbelievingly not knowing what to say. So instead, Mase spoke for him.

"Hardy, what the hell kind of kid are you raising? She just shot me! I could die! She's crazy!" Jojo's smile disappeared at this.

"You ain't seen crazy yet," She growled as she stood and began to close in on him. Jeff grabbed her from behind, but he wasn't able to catch her arms, to stop her from pulling the trigger a second time, like Matt had with Danny. Jeff shrieked as another bullet made contact with Mase, in his leg this time. Red liquid began to ooze out of that wound too. The three men shrieked, and his friends tried to haul the injured Mase back to his truck. They quickly got in and sped off as Jojo struggled in Jeff's arms.

"Will you let me go?" She yelled.

"Drop the gun, Jojo, please. Just drop it, kitten," Jeff cooed in her ear, trying to reason with her. Jojo rolled her eyes and dropped the gun without a second thought.

"Now, will you let me go?...Please?" Jojo cooed back in a baby voice. Jeff, panicked, let her go, but held on to her shoulders, looking into her eyes.

"Sweetheart, it didn't need to come to this..." Jeff droned on about how much she had to live for and how she wouldn't accomplish it if she went to jail for manslaughter.

Jojo sighed," Gosh, Jeff, you're just as dramatic as Mase. It's only a paintball gun!"

**So...Love it? Hate it? Just review it! Tell me if Jeff Hardy should mentor Jojo in the actual story or if it should be one of the other candidates. Or even if you just have somehting random to say. Seriously, just review, I sat up til 11:14 to finish this after a sparring class. And Jojo was bullying me the whole while I wrote it!**  
><strong>Jojo:Cuz you didn't give me a real gun!<strong>  
><strong>Go back to Hostile Takeover, Chapter 1, Lines 47-48: You know DAMN well you ain't getting anyhting with the words 'hot' or 'gun' in it! The paintball gun was a large stretch.<strong>  
><strong>Danny: So what, would this double as one for me and Matt too?<strong>  
><strong>Kind of...you two didn't really do much in here, but remind me to write one of you and Matt!<strong>  
><strong>Danny:KK! How bout next one?<strong>  
><strong>Can't, next one is you and Kane...Don't blame me, it's Aj's fault...<strong>


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